Lost in a Dream

by Blusummrs

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05:37

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released June 17, 2016

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Blusummrs Fort Collins, Colorado

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Track Name: Once Bitten
What a thrill
What a thrill
I'm searching
Searching

What a thrill
With darkness and silence through the night
What a thrill
I'm searching and I'll melt into you
I'm searching
Searching

Searching

What a fear in my heart
But you're so supreme
I'd give my life
Not for honor
But for you
I'm still in a dream
Searching
I'm still in a dream
Searching

What a thrill

I'm still in a dream
Searching
I'm still in a dream
Searching
Track Name: Plural Form Pseudo Worlds
The subject of this speech
Is a topic
Which has been discovered recently
And which may not exist at all

I may be talking about something that does not exist
Therefore I am free to say everything or nothing

I and my stories and novels often write about counterfeit worlds
Some are real worlds
As well as deranged private worlds
Inhabited often by just one person
While meantime the other characters either remain in their own world throughout
Or are somehow drawn into one of the peculiar ones
With these plural form pseudo worlds

But now I think I understand
What I was sensing
Was the manifolds of partially actualized realities
Lying tangent to what evidently is the most actualized one
The one which the majority of us
By consensus gentium agree on
At no time did I have a theoretical or conscious explanation for my preoccupation
With these plural form pseudo worlds

Later that day
Back home again
But still deeply under the influence of the Sodium Pentothal
I had a short acute flash of recovered memory
Then in mid March
A month later
The total body of memories
Intact and entire
Began to return
With these plural form pseudo worlds

You are free to believe me
Or to disbelieve
But please take my word on it
That I am not joking
This is very serious
A matter of importance

At that time I had no idea what I was seeing
It resembled nothing that I ever heard described
It resembled plasmic energy
It had color
It moved fast
It collected and then dispersed
But what it was
What he was
I am not sure even now
You are free to believe me
Or to disbelieve
But I am not joking
This is very serious

In other words
It's a common theme in my writing
That a dark haired girl
Shows up at the door of the protagonist
And tells him that his world is delusional
That there's something false about it
Well this did finally happen to me
With these plural form pseudo worlds

I even knew that her hair would be black
I had an actual complete sense
Of what she would look like
And What she would say
She did appear
She was a total stranger
And she did inform me of this fact
Some of my fictional works
Were in a literal sense true

These plural form pseudo worlds

People claim to remember past lives
I claim to remember a different, very different present life
I know of no one who has ever made this claim before
But I rather suspect that my experience is not unique
What perhaps is unique is the fact that I'm willing to talk about it
We are living in a computer programmed reality
And the only clue we have to it
Is when some variable is changed
And some alteration in our reality occurs
With these plural form pseudo worlds
Track Name: Manipulating Symbols
Into a kind of psychedelic state
To overwhelm
The sensibilities
To tip them over

There is some confusion
As to what magic actually is
Indeed to cast a spell
Is simply to spell
Grimoire for example, the book of spells
Is simply a fancy way of saying grammar

Art whether that be writing, music, sculpture
Or any other form
Is literally magic

The very language of magic
The science of manipulating symbols, words, or images
To manipulate words
I believe that magic is art
The kind of narrative journey
To achieve changes in consciousness
That can change a human being
That can change a society

To change people's consciousness
I believe that this is completely literal
And direct it to
Different places, different levels
Into a kind of psychedelic state
To overwhelm
The sensibilities
To tip them over

The science of manipulating symbols, words, or images
Seems to be talking as much about writing or art
As it is about supernatural events

Every human soul
Is in fact one human soul
It is the soul of the universe itself

When we are doing the will of our true self
We are inevitably doing the will of the universe
In magic these are seen as indistinguishable
And as long as you are doing the will of the universe
Then it is impossible to do anything wrong
Track Name: Rebirth
Now in the dark world where I dwell
Ugly things and surprising things
Spill out at me constantly
And sometimes little wondrous things

Sometimes little wondrous things
Spill out at me constantly
And I can count on nothing

Now in the dark world where I dwell
Sometimes little
Sometimes little wondrous things
Spill out at me constantly
And I can count on

The pain
So unexpected and undeserved
Yet for some reason cleared away the cobwebs
What happened?
How'd I get here?

I hated my life
My house
My family
It had to end
And I could count on nothing

Now in the dark world where I dwell
Sometimes little
Sometimes little wondrous things
Spill out at me constantly
And I can count on

How'd I get here?
Nothing would ever change
Nothing new could ever be expected
I hated my life

It had to end
And it did

And I could count on nothing